A SOOOO very late birthday fic

[silverraven]

For kate. I hope you like it, sweets!

I wanted to get it finished by her birthday but the darn thing refused to cooperate. Six re-writes later and it finally settled on 'John and Rodney, camping'. My brain...I've learned just to go with it.

Roughing It
John/Rodney, PG, ~1900 words. Set early season one.


Rodney stared at the heavy canvas and the four long aluminum poles that were supposed to make up a dome tent with a frown. The Ursbie’s were a matrilocal society, no unclaimed males were allowed in the village, a man needed to be a woman’s son, brother, father, or mate. Ford had drawn the longest straw, so he and Teyla got a nice, cozy yurt with a feather mattress and fur blankets, while Rodney got a tent and sleeping bag.

Not fair.

"Why do we have to rough it? Can't we just go back to the gate and return in the morning?" he asked the major. "Or never at all," was muttered under his breath.

“We're on a mission, McKay," Sheppard said behind him. “Besides, this isn't roughing it. Haven’t you ever gone camping?”

“Once.”

He was twelve, and Jeannie had insisted, begging their parents all summer until they finally agreed. He hadn’t wanted to go; all he could think about were bears. Didn’t matter that they hadn’t been seen in the area for years, Rodney had been sure they were there. Looking at him from behind the trees, just waiting for it to get dark. He’d been so terrified that he hadn’t sleep at all, laying rigidly in his sleeping bag, alert for the slightest noise.

He’d finally heard it, sometime during the long endless darkness – a scraping sound that made the hair on the back of his neck stand up. Sure that they were going to be mauled and eaten any second, he’d screamed and tried frantically to get out of his damn mummy bag. The zipper had jammed. In a frenzy, he’d jumped up and started hopping around like a madman out of the tent and toward the car, yelling at the top of his lungs.

The car had been locked and he was about to break a window if his howling hadn’t raised the entire campground. People came running from all over, flashlights and lanterns and car beams flared, pinning the culprit in the light.

The huge, ravenous grizzly had turned out to be a raccoon. Who had glanced up with wide eyes from the pots and pans he was sitting on and promptly scoured off. To this day Rodney hadn’t forgotten his mortification. Just remembering the incident had him red-faced again.

“I hate camping." He glanced up, wrinkling his brow. “Major, does that look like rain?”

The clouds looked darker then they had before and as Sheppard answered, “I think so,” the sun was blocked by scudding drift.

“What are we going to do?” He turned to face Sheppard.

“Do?” He chuckled. “It’s just some rain, Rodney. Unless you’re scared you’re going to melt?”

Rodney rolled his eyes, reminded himself again that Sheppard’s teasing or the way the skin around his eyes would crinkle up when he laughed was in no way appealing.

“Of course not,” he said indignantly. “It’s just –“

“What? We have a tent, remember? We’ll be safe.”

Safe? In a tent, during a rainstorm, out in the middle of nowhere. God, the major was a moron.

“Let’s just get the tent up all ready.” Rodney kneeled down, with one eye on the growing clouds and the other on the instructions for erecting a tent that he'd stuffed into his bag, he calculated that they should have the stupid thing up long before the rain came.

If they didn’t dawdle.

When Rodney glanced up again he noticed that Sheppard was strolling down to the water. What the hell was the idiot doing?

“Where are you going?” he demanded. They didn’t have time for this.

The major turned to him. “Just checking out the lake.”

He crossed his arms, feeling more riled by the second. “For what?”

“I don’t know.” Sheppard shrugged. “Maybe there’s some fish we could eat for dinner.”

“Are you out of your mind?! Even if there are fish and you somehow catch one, you don’t know if it’s poisonous or has some kind of bacteria or or…”

His lips turned down when he noticed the huge grin on Sheppard's face.

“Yes, haha. Now how about you help me?”

“Why?” Sheppard asked innocently. “Aren’t you the one with the mechanical engineering degree?”

Well, yes, when Sheppard put it like that...he could do this. He was the CSO for god's sake, he could damn well put up a tent.

He was reaching out to grab one corner when he felt a shadow cast over him. He took a glance over his shoulder and jerked in surprise at finding Sheppard standing right behind him, grinning.

"Figured I'll help out," he drawled, eye twinkling.

To Rodney's chagrin, Sheppard didn't need the instructions he'd hoarded so carefully. In seconds, the tent was spread out on the ground.

"How'd you do that?"

"Years of practice, kind of comes with being in the military."

Oh, right. "I um-"

"How about you hand me the first pole?" Sheppard interrupted and held out his palm.

Rodney's jaw might have dropped just a little when with a flick of Sheppard's wrist the pole extended beautifully, the segments inside the tube unfolding in a graceful curve.

"Do you want to try?" Sheppard asked, probably picking up on how Rodney was eyeing the rod.

He looked up at the rapidly darkening sky and shook his head. "Go ahead." He'd like to get the tent up before the flood, and as much as he didn't want to admit it, Sheppard knew what he was doing better than Rodney did.

Sheppard inserted the rod into the first canvas sleeve. When he finished, Rodney was holding out the second pole, then the third. By the time Sheppard was ready to insert all the poles into the clamp at the top of the tent, Rodney was sure they would be finished before it started raining. Clamped together, the poles bowed out and instantly the tent puffed out into a dome.

One corner of Rodney's mouth curved up, they did it.

He felt a drop of water hit his nose. With dread, he gazed up. Sure enough the sky was a dark blackish-grey and another drop of rain hit his cheek.

"Major..." A loud roll of thunder boomed. Not good. He hated thunder, always had. Hunching his shoulders to his ears, he wondered if it would be better to make a mad dash to the Stargate than stay here.

"Yeah?" Sheppard asked from inside the tent.

"I was think-" Another crush of thunder. He looked quickly toward the gate, a tiny dot at the far edge of the valley.

Sheppard stuck his head out and smirked. He held the tent flap up and with a bow said, "Mi casa es su casa."

Rodney rolled his eyes and was about to retort when the skies seemed to open - he may have made a very small undignified sound before stumbling in hastily.

He squeezed his eyes shut, telling himself there was no need to panic. At least, not yet. They had shelter, it was just some rain. He took a deep breath and released it slowly.

Calmer, he glanced around. He hadn't realized the ceiling was so low, or that the space was so...puny. No real space at all for two grown men. He backed away to make more room, feeling his heart rate increase. Room, he needed room.

His foot brushed against something, his eyes widening when he heard the shushing sound of the pole segments retracting and he whirled around.

"Oh, no!"

"What...?!" Sheppard shouted as a section of the tent collapsed.

Rodney jerked back around and saw Sheppard step back. "Don't!" he yelled but it was too late.

His foot hit the retract button and with the same shush, another pole retracted. The remaining two rods weren't strong enough to hold up the tent and broke. In seconds, they were enveloped in a sea of green canvas.

"McKay?" Sheppard called. Rodney could hear him fighting his way out of the tent, but he was too stunned to answer.

"Rodney?" he called again, this time more anxiously.

"I'm here," he answered and a moment later Sheppard lifted the section that had fallen over him.

"Are you all right? Why didn't you answer me?"

"I'm fine," Rodney mumbled, forcing himself to sit up. "How about you?"

"Yeah, I'm okay." Sheppard looked around from under the temporary roof he'd made over them. "Can you fix it?"

Rodney frowned. "No...unless you got two extra poles with you?"

Sheppard shook his head.

Great, just great. "I think we should go back to the gate."

"It's still raining," Sheppard reminded.

He glared at him. "So? Afraid you'll melt?"

Sheppard just laughed. "Touche. You've got a streak of dirt across your cheek." He reached out toward Rodney's face but Rodney flinched back.

He scrubbed at his face, thinking he was probably covered with dirt. He was miserable. They had no shelter, the rain wasn't stopping, thunder rolling every minute or so and he hated camping. Why anyone thought this was a pleasurable recreational activity was beyond him.

"Hey," Sheppard said gently and this time when he reached out, Rodney didn't pull away.

Unwillingly, he looked up at the major. They were so close, he could see the flecks of green and gold in Sheppard's eyes.

A moment later and Sheppard's mouth brushed his. His lips were warm, a little chapped, hesitant. It was as if he wasn't sure of Rodney's reaction.

Rodney wasn't so sure of it himself. He just sat there.

The pressure of Sheppard's mouth increased and Rodney closed his eyes, giving in to something he'd been waiting every since he saw Sheppard in the chair...

Rodney forgot they were half buried under a tent, forgot about the storm. There was only the drumming of the rain, a counterpoint to the loud beating of his heart. Without thought, his arms came around Sheppard's neck, gasping when he felt Sheppard move closer. Their chests pressed together and Rodney was about to push Sheppard to lie down when a booming clap of thunder sounded.

He reared back, pushing Sheppard away.

"Rodney...?" He stroked Rodney's cheek, concern in his face.

"I'm fine" he muttered and pulled back but Sheppard grabbed his arm.

"The rain is dying down, storm should be over soon."

Rodney eyed him hopefully. "Then we can go back to the gate?"

"We could. Or..." Sheppard paused, there was a devilish glint in his eyes. "We could stay here."

Stay here? "I know there's not a lot going on underneath that crazy hair but in case you might have not noticed we have no tent."

"But we have two dry sleeping beds." He wiggled his eyebrow in what he probably thought was sly but just made him look insane.

One corner of Rodney's mouth went up without his permission. "The ground's wet."

"The chiefess mentioned there's a cave not too far from here"

Damnit, there went the another corner. "What if we get cold?"

"There's plenty of firewood and," Sheppard leaned in, lips against Rodney ear, "we have each other."

"Well." Rodney pretended to think it over. "I suppose it wouldn't be right to leave Teyla and Ford alone on an alien planet."

"Not right at all," Sheppard agreed and nipped at Rodney's ear.

Rodney nodded, turned his head toward Sheppard and kissed him.

He could rough it one night. For Teyla and Ford.